Call it graciousness, charm, politeness, good human relations, positive reinforcement, office politics, obsequiousness, making others feel good, or sucking up—whatever the name, confident and magnetic people do it consistently.

A notable characteristic of personally magnetic people is their ability and willingness to flatter others and build their self-esteem or self-worth. If you can learn to flatter others effectively, you will substantially augment your ability to attract and retain supporters.

Flattery works well with about 95 percent of the people who have sufficient mental ability to comprehend the compliments. The young, the old, the rich, the poor, the famous, the unknown, the sick, and the well all respond to sensible flattery. The other 5 per- cent are people with low self-esteem, the calloused, and the jaundiced. The people who do not respond to flattery ward off compliments, preferring to let their good deeds speak for themselves.

A striking advantage of learning to flatter is that flattery is a powerful vehicle for enhancing magnetism. Also, learning how to flatter is easier than developing other habits required for being confident, such as modifying your thinking patterns or increasing your emotional expressiveness.

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