Understanding that impotency is a common problem at every stage of marriage is the first, and highest, hurdle that most couples have to clear. If yourself or your husband are experiencing such a problem and are unsure of how to deal with it, then the following tips will help:

1. Consider that impotency may be simply a wake-up call that is signifying an underlying problem elsewhere in the relationship. Instead of banishing feelings of frustration, unhappiness, or emotional overload in your life, ask yourselves if something is bothering one or both of you.

2. Talk about it. Talking about the problem can be reassuring and often lessens the anxiety for both partners. In fact, the more both partners worry about their problems, the more intractable it becomes. Sit down and talk about issues in a non-confrontational, nonjudgmental, and non-hurried way. Once you both find the courage to talk about these things, you may quickly find that the sexual stage fright will disappear entirely.


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