Many men and women often feel unfairly criticized by their partner, yet find themselves powerless to defend themselves. If you are having a similar problem, then the steps below can help you rebuild your self-esteem and regain your footing:

1. Remind yourself that you are entitled to your feelings. You have every right to stand up and say: “I am extremely offended by what you said and I do not appreciate it!” If the problem persists, then walk away, as this will send a powerful message back to your bickering partner.

2. The worst thing you can do in retaliation to criticism is to respond back in the same negative manner. This escalates the argument and creates more of a power struggle. Most often the people who criticize their spouses feed off of return anger, so do not be angry, simply walk away and ignore them.

3. Ask yourself (and be honest with your answer) if there may be a shred of truth to what your partner is saying when they are criticizing you. They may have a valid point but just does not know how to peacefully get that point across without using criticism. If this is the case, then you should be the better person but being honest with yourself and consider what your partner is saying as possible truth.


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